Do I have to invite them to my wedding?

Updated: Mar 24

When I got married, this was one of the hardest decisions we had to make. The guest list is so important because it is often aligned with what your wedding will cost. Even when you book your venue (typically 12-14 months in advance) they will need a preliminary guest count. Most importantly these are the people you are choosing to share one of the most important days of your life, these people are important and they will be in your wedding photos/video forever!



I understand that it can be tough to even come up with a number, which is why I wanted to create this blog post to help you answer the question “Do I have to invite them to my wedding?”


Sit down with your partner and make a list on all the people you want to have there.

I would start with your immediate family, then close family members, then move on to close friends, and then acquaintances etc.

Tip: Don’t ask your parents/families for their list yet. Keep it between you and your partner at first so that you both can get a starting point without too many opinions.


Here are some questions to consider when making your list:

1. Do I 100% want them there?

2. Does your partner want them there?

3. Have they been your friend for 10+ years?

4. Are they married to someone in your family?

5. Have you spoken to them in the last year?

6. Were you invited to their wedding as a guest?

7. Were you in their wedding as a bridesmaid or groomsmen?

8. Are they dating your bridesmaid or groomsmen?

9. Would you want to dance with them during your reception?

10. Will it be awkward/uncomfortable if they don’t get invited?


Decide if you want to have kids at your wedding

Kids are typically 12 and under from a catering stand point, but some people feel like under 18 is considered a kid. It’s up to you, but just stick to it.


Give your guests a plus 1 & include it in your count

I know that when paying per person it can get expensive and slightly annoying to give them a plus one, but its just polite. Give them a plus one.


In the end, invite the people that make you feel good! This is such an important day and you will have the images forever. You don’t have to invite anyone you really don’t want to, just keep the communication open with your partner and everything will work out!


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San Luis Obispo Wedding Photographer

Serving the Californa Central Coast: Monterey, Carmel, Big Sur, Santa Barbara and Beyond

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© 2020 By Kelley Williams Photography | San Luis Obispo Wedding Photographer | 831-613-1070

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